Today’s post is for those of you who have been attacked by people for the way you dress, know that I’m with you and have suffered too like you. This phase too shall pass.
I was invited to a graduation ceremony sometime around July this year at a mission school and the dress code for everybody was to dress decent, of course, except that they had their terms for what they considered decent, especially for women. Women were not allowed to go in in trousers of any kind, except gowns and skirts. I could not go in of course because I was putting on a trouser and so I stood outside with the person that invited me to gist for a while about the ridiculousness of the school.
- Ridiculousness number one, the law that governs us all as a country doesn’t give to anybody a dress code. Maybe the the executive would have to pass a Dress Code Act (Buhari and friends I hope y’all are reading this) or something because I do not understand what is going on in Nigeria.
- Ridiculousness number two, the so called decent gowns and skirts for girls were so not decent especially on the very fat girl I saw in a yellow short dress that did not flatter her size or shape. Plus it was a sunny, breezy day and the breeze kept blowing her short yellow dress away and kept showing us some eye-scarring light-skinned laps.
I do not know if it is the fear that “The younger generation is loosing morals”. Truth is one way or the other moral ties would depart from Nigeria. Same way it left Europe and the Americas. Oh, but then again, Nigeria is a higly hypocritical
I honestly do not understand the need for private schools expecially mission private schools. Parents pay too much money for just little impact. The children are not — IN MY OPINION — half as good as children at public schools. I know how much my father pays for my younger brothers at school. I hear him tell them that the fees he pays in a term is my school fees from Jss1 to SS3 with all the extra charges involved and provisions money. I hear about how students in schools like Covenant, Bowen, Babcock, live double lives. Saints in school and thugs out of school kind of life.
The children of the school I was visiting were not going to get corrupt by seeing visitors put on trousers and walk around their school. The chairs and tables of the school would not be defiled, except if their school ground is some burning bush spot or something. The women who put on trousers are not the trousers they wear. Trousers have really become convenient for women and has more or less saved some women from rape especially when they want to run. God bless the people that invented trousers — Let’s take a moment to actually pray for them– In fact, my father believes and I too, that when I’m going out and not being drived around with the family, or people I know, I should put on trousers incase I had to run. Besides, most of us were Visitors for goodness sake! Invited by parents and guardians to feliciate with them. Then a school, for reasons best known to them decided to rob people off that joy.
Then it’s like the men at the post take pride in this job of preventing the ‘offenders’ and then harrass women even more. In my uni today (A public uni btw), a girl was deterred from writing her paper because she wore a long skirt with wedge heels and they deemed her indecent. While a girl putting on leggings and a short top was allowed to enter which was very ridiculous especially for a girl with a very big behind. I’m not judging her dressing, all I’m saying is that comparing both, we can all see who is ‘indecently’ dressed.
I was deterred to from attending a class once because I was wearing a sleeveless shirt and my ‘armpit was showing’. These men look for nothing but our begging. The derive joy in seeing women beg. I get that their job is really boring and they lash out on us women. I am aware, many girls do not understand the dynamics of dressing and end up dressing in ways that punish the eyes, but it’s truly excessive and irrelevant the way these men treat women.
The Dos and DON’Ts in my opinion do not add up. People end up becoming who they are supposed to be. It is understandable that some of these schools are ‘Mission’ schools, but most times these rules do not help the students at all. I believe trainning a child begins and ends when the child is in his formative years. A child is well over his formative years when he is passed the age of 13-16 — This of course is debatable.
Fashion trends will come and go and we women will move with the trend, it is however, our values that make us who we are not the clothes we wear. Nigeria is fast becoming individualistic in nature and this communal attitude of being brothers keeper and telling a child or person what is wrong or right is fast becoming history. It’s best if people held on to their beliefs and live other people to live out theirs. If they are going down a dangerous path there are ways to correct they person not by humiliating them. Bottomline is that indecency is relative and that’s why even in a morally bound country like Nigeria, some parents allow their children put on what others consider disgraceful.
Public schools have deteriorated, hence the rise of private schools in Nigeria. It is okay to teach good morals and values, however certain ‘values’ are not shared by everyone especially in a society that is culturally drifting to fit perfectly amongst other nations.